OK, so in my last blog, I wrote about my relationship with running.
How I remembered loving it as a child and then after several negative experiences with it in my early teen years, I finally came back around to loving it as a Senior in High School.
And SOOOOOO, if this was the case, why are the years since (and there has been a few, my HS 20 yr. reunion has come and gone), why are the years since not filled with constant running and many many races??
This has been the question I have been pondering since I last wrote.
I have lots of excuses.
Lets see... How about?
College- I remember a few runs around the Provo, Temple, but mostly staying up too late and being more consumed with classes, work and, Oh yeah, BOYS, which I guess were really Young Men at the time. Also during college, can't forget, the FIT FOR LIFE class where I found out I was OBESE at 145 lbs and 27% body fat. That was fun. Oh if they could see me now! I would love to be that weight! Still haven't gotten over that. Anyways by the end of the class I had done the running I needed to and was able to do the mile and 1/2 in the time needed for an A, which I was proud of, even though I was sucking wind at the end, I still did it! As I go over this I really have to wonder why they structure a Fitness class to create such negative experiences?Why not reward improvement instead of measuring everyone against a fixed standard? Anyways, let's see, after college and tying the knot, came...
Oh yeah pregnancy and children!
6 pregnancies and 6 children.
I remember committing to myself with each pregnancy this time I am going to make it through without quitting exercise! And each time I failed!
Sometimes I would pick exercise back up after the nausea and exhaustion which of course was good, but make it all the way through, never happened for me.
The nursing side of pregnancy was even harder. Talk about exhaustion, and the thought of getting up extra early to nurse so I didn't have to run with boulder boobs was never enticing. Add in the fact that in AZ during much of the year, if you miss the chance to go early in the morning, you are in for misery, pregnant, nursing or not!
And so, let's see, I also have the injury excuses. Shin splints being the main issue, of course, because I would try and do too much. Like the time I joined Nancy Brough and her running gang, going from not running to pounding the pavement with a fit group. Not so smart!
I've done this multiple times. I wish I had known then that rest was actually a good thing. When I would start exercising I would usually set the goal of 6 days a week. And if I missed a day I would feel disappointed in myself. And then let weeks go by.
After my last child, Emily, I tried to do things smart. Build up slowly. For me anyways. Took rest when I had to. Iced the shins, etc. I was doing fairly well actually, even did my first and only 10K, the Mesa Turkey Trot. And then one Saturday, after what felt like a pretty strenous workout at the HS track, I came home and broke out in red bumps. My husband said I looked like a bunch of mosquitos had attacked me. I didn't know what it was. By Sunday evening, as they were getting fluid filled I was wondering about chicken pox, which I had already had. Maybe shingles? Then on Monday they were the size of quarters and red and raised and angry looking. I looked like an Alien. Turns out it was hives, an allergic reaction to Valley Fever, a fungus. Anyways, it was quite scary for me. And luckily after a few months, they went away, thank-goodness for turtlenecks! But unfortunately the combination of exhertion and breaking out in Alien spots was connected in my mind. And although I would go out and walk, I was scared to push myself to even walk fast. Or maybe I was just tired from the Valley Fever, I wasn't sure. Eventually I realized I was just scared. It took me a while to get up the nerve to face that fear down. Of course, throwing in a couple of miscarriages didn't help either.
And that brings us up to about a year ago. I'm starting to face down that fear and trying to get in shape again and looking forward to hiking the Grand Canyon in the Fall, when a friend tells me about a lot of success she's had with a bladder surgery. That is really exciting to me! Really, I don't have to live with the issue of incontinence? Mostly it was just a problem during exercise, and sneezing. But still no fun! Pictures from a Gilbert Days 5K years earlier revealed that the problem was apparent to anyone around, despite my best efforts to empty before the race. But to get this surgery in and include recovery time before the hike is a bit of a stretch. It is either that or postpone surgery to after the hike, which doesn't make running much fun in the meantime. I went for the surgery and it went well.
At the appropriate time, I started back into exercise and tried to really go slow. No Shin Splints for me this time!
I'd been running maybe 6-8 weeks, it was end of last summer, and I get this idea to join a Running Club. I thought I would get some personalized instruction to help prevent injury. All they asked was how much I had been running. I told them 12-16 miles a week. They thought that was great considering the heat at the time. They never asked how long I had been running for. Also at the same time, I went to "THEEE" Running Store and got the appropriate running shoes for me. Apparently I was in the exact wrong ones for me, and the Running Guy was surprised I didn't have any problems at the time. I suppose having the "right" shoes and being in a club with experts made me think I could train with abandon. I threw myself into the Running Club work-outs, along with continuiing my own, don't think I mentioned this to the club either. Anyways shortly thereafter, one night after a Running Club workout, my achilles felt like someone had pounded mercilessly on it. I mentioned this to a coach and she recommended rubbing the ball of my foot on a tennis ball. Which I did, and it felt wonderful. I could tell my foot was very tight. And my achilles felt 90% better. So full steam ahead. I went early one morning to the HS track and did stairs before I did a speed workout with Lindy and crew. Well at the end of that workout, I knew I had a problem. I could hardly walk to my car. How is it that you can go from feeling like an athlete at one moment and a cripple the next, so quickly?
Now I finally did some reading and found out the achilles is an injury that is a bugger to get rid of! GREATT!! And guess what else, hills and sprints are hard on it!
Well, what to do? The challenge of the Grand Canyon is looming in the not so distant future. I had hiked it before, and had been running around 4 miles at the time. But this time we were going to hike it North to South in one day. I felt like I need to be running around 6 miles no problem. And I definitely had a problem. I could hardly walk. After another trip to the Running Store, could it be the shoes? It happened when I got the new ones, "No, it's just tight calves" so here's a calf stretcher, which also helped the pain, again about 90%.
At this point I didn't feel like I had much choice but to rest it. I wish I had gone to a physical therapist who could have helped me keep exercising, but I didn't know one who would, and I was scared of the cost. Resting helped slowly, and I vacillated about what to do about the Grand Canyon. I really wanted to do it. But what if it made it worse? What if the pain got bad and I got stuck in the Grand Canyon? It seemed that if I stretched my calf, the pain would loosen up, quite a bit. So I finally decided to go for it. And I made it through the Grand Canyon without having to take a helicopter ride out! Me and Advil and Tylenol and lots of calf stretching made it through the hike. Not in the kind of shape that I would have liked but I did it. And amazingly, I didn't feel like I had made it much worse.
So then why wouldn't this pain just go away??
Shortly after the Grand Canyon I went for a walk, and the pain just started throbbing, and I could barely make it home. OK, I thought time to really give it rest. I abandoned exercise with the hope that someday I could start it up again without such pain. Part of me wondered if I was just being a wimp though.
I gave it almost 3 months. And it was probably 1 1/2 months before I could notice it getting better.
At the beginning of this year, I decided it was time to get back into exercise. The achilles felt a lot better but I knew it wasn't all gone. Sometimes it would just start to throb at the strangest times, like in the morning in bed. I decided whatever the cost I would see a Physical Therapist and I started with one I knew. I hoped he could help me get exercising without aggravating the achilles again. When he ultrasounded the steroid cream into my leg, wow it felt heavenly. I realized it had been hurting even when I didn't think it hurt. Anyways, my insurance only approved so many visits and the problem was not cured but at least I was back exercising and it was manageable. Meanwhile, I went to the Running Store again, my daughter needed some shoes, and found out the Running Guy was dealing with an achilles issue as well. Now that I'm familiar with it, it seems like I hear about it all the time. He told me he was seeing a Physical Therapist that attempts to break the scar tissue by scraping his achilles and then has him run on it. I took the guys card and decided if I needed to I would see this guy.
I finished the therapy with this other guy and the biggest thing I learned from it was that I don't need to kill myself to see improvement. The exercises he would have me do and the rate at which he increased the challenge was so small. I realized I have a tendency to overdo it. At which point you are probably thinking I am a slow learner too. Yep I am.
After doing some more reading in my running books, I happened onto a 13 week program for a beginner to eventually do a 10K. I decided that would be good for me to start out as if I was a beginner because I actually was. One thing this book taught me too, which seems so obvious now, and I don't know why I didn't figure it out on my own given my experiences, but it is that ONE INCREASES IN CARDIOVASCULAR FITNESS FASTER THAN ONE INCREASES IN MUSCLE AND SKELETAL FITNESS. This explained to me why I would always feel like running faster and longer but then get injured when I did. Having a regimented plan has helped me not to overdo it. It has been hard to walk as much as it says and rest when it says but then I feel so much better the next run! I have so much respect for the expertise that has gone into this program. The little variations in the workouts seem so minor to me when I look at them, but when I do them, I realize it is just what my body needs.
Anyways I have come to realize although running seems like such a simple sport, it really isn't. At least I can find lots of ways to mess it up or mess myself up with it.
And so these are my excuses for explaining why my relationship with running has been a series of fits and starts. And in the end, I can hear my son's Cross Country Coach saying, they are just that EXCUSES. He has compiled a list of Excuses that is pages long, that have been said to him over the years. And I know myself that there are many runners who wouldn't have been stopped by my excuses. I so admire Lindy for running through Melissa's pregnancy, even doing a Marathon. It just blows my mind.
I guess I just haven't been committed enough. I'm hoping to be a committed runner for the forseeable future. I have just finished 9 weeks of this 13 week program with only one missed workout due to flu and achille's issues. Glad they were together. And I ran for 4 weeks before that. So I am going on 3 months of running. I know this is nothing compared to most but it is good for me.
Having this achilles issue has been a pain but at the same time when I run without pain now I really appreciate it. I know what a wonderful thing that is! And I've learned that I can see results without overdoing it.
So here's "the long rest of the story" from my HS days until now. I hope that the next chapters of my relationship with running are not filled with excuses but more commitment and more enjoyment of a sport that is both simple and complicated at the same time.
I was just thinking this morning, how I so enjoy the simplicity of just putting one foot in front of the other. I love focusing on that. Probably as you can tell my thoughts get so crazy the rest of my life.
So I don't have so much experience as some of the runners on this blog, and it is rather intimidating but I enjoy reading it all the same and getting inspired, so thanks!
Bryn
